Stress!

I just feel beyond stressed lately, I'm having the hardest time dealing with everyday life.  And no, it's not PMS.  I just feel like there's too much going on all at once and I can't catch my breath.  Instead of trying to break it down into smaller chunks, I'm overwhelmed and just go and lay in bed.  I'm probably a poster child for depression, but with no health insurance, getting treatment is not even an option, and maybe that stresses me out and depresses me more!

February is a big month for us.  Garrett's birthday is the 1, our wedding anniversary is the 12, Payton's birthday is the 16 and mine is the 18th.  Throw valentines day in there, and yes, I'm financially done.  We also now have 2 close friends who kids birthday's are in feb, so add in 2 more birthday gifts, maybe you see why I'm stressed.  It's like Christmas all over again!!

We've come to the conclusion that we just can't buy much for the kids, we've done this the last 2 years and it's been ok.  We did get Garrett a gift, something he's been asking for, and we think he'll really like it, but we did not spend much.  I have no ideas for Payton yet, but it will be similar, something pretty inexpensive.  We are combining their birthday parties this year, in the hopes that it will help reduce our costs somewhat.  I have a lady coming with reptiles; snakes, lizards and turtles, she'll be here an hour and only costs $40!  I'm loving her!  It will def be more geared towards Garrett, but at 2, Payton just doesn't much care.  I do need to get some more party ideas nailed down, maybe that will relieve some stress.

Tonight, I'll be making "dirt cupcakes" for Garrett's class, we've opted to not do a goody bag, too many kids, too expensive.  Then we'll start on hand making some valentines, then I'll need to bake something for Payton's class and immediately turn around and get into party planning mode, the house party is just 3 days after her little class party.  Oh, and the 16th, her bday, we have to be in court, that is so fun :-(  I hate that I won't be with her on her bday, but we'll be home in time for dinner, so I think she'll be ok.

There's a ridiculous amount of paperwork that the attorney needs for our bankruptcy case, and not having  a fax has been an issue, but thanks to some great friends we have, I can stop by their office anytime and use their fax machine.  The kids seem to like going there, and everyone in the office loves on them and doesn't seem to mind us being there.  At least they aren't locking the stores screaming, she's here, again, lol.  But, that's just more stress.  Imagine getting going on a project and the attorney calls, he needs a certain document now, so we grab our things and rush out the door, usually the kids don't understand the urgency and I have one or 2 that are crying. 

The business is doing ok, it's still a pretty slow time of year, but there's all kinds of new things, w-2's, filing business taxes, setting up new accounts for tax purposes (per the bankruptcy trustee), it's just a lot.  If my kids were in daycare all day, everyday it'd probably be ok, but I have to work around their schedules and make sure I have snacks and drinks, diapers, toys, etc.

Seriously, is it March yet?!?!?  I want a vacation from my head!