Back to work

I've been back to work for a week, it's been an interesting week.  Thursday I worked 8-5, but we had 1.5 hours for lunch, so I came home, ate lunch, ran to 2 banks and picked up a check from a customer, so yes, I can work in an office and help Matt.  Friday I was off, since it was Good Friday and the daycare was closed, they told me not to worry about coming in sine it was such a short notice for me to start.  So this week was my first official week of work.  This week we work 8-2, but we don't take a lunch.  I've had to get very organized very fast.  I drop the kids off right at 7:30, then I fly over to work, they want us there at 7:45, but most days I arrive at 7:50 and I'm the first one there, so there's obviously some flexibility there.  But, the days are long.  I'm not used to not eating and drinking when I want.  We can go in the break room and grab a snack whenever we want, as long as there aren't patients waiting.  Some days this is fine, some days it's very busy and it's harder to find the time to snack.  But, after work, I help Matt.  I run errands, I send invoices, I collect checks, I run to the bank, etc.  Because Payton lays down at school right about 2:15, it's too hard for me to get there before she's asleep and since I'm paying until 5:30 whether I get them or not, most days I'll leave them there.  Garrett gets to play and Payton can nap.  But, today, today was rough, she's not getting her normal 2.5-3 hour nap, so that girl is tired at night.  This morning when I got her up, she cried, when I put her in the car, she cried, when we got to school she cried, and when I left her, she cried.  It almost broke my heart.  She has gymnastics on Thursday, so Stef sent me a text and said she was in a mismatched outfit, which means she had an accident and had an accident during gymnastics, and she clung to Stefani and didn't want to go back to her room.  I decided I was going to race over there and bring her home so she could nap at home, in her own bed.  She was SO excited to see me!!  And boy did she sleep!  I woke her at the 3 hour mark and by 7:30 she was asking to go to bed.  Of course, as soon as she's in bed, I have to make lunches for the next day and repack her backpack, and make sure Garrett has all his stuff and tonight I folded laundry, as well as ran to Target for diapers and then made invoices for Matt.  Am I doing anything any other working mother does?  I'm just saying, it's a lot.  I did get my first paycheck today, it wasn't much, but it felt good to be able to contribute to the household bills.  I know there's an adjustment period for all of us and I"m so grateful that we do work short days a lot and that means I can go get the kids if I want to.  It means not as big of a check since we never work 40 hours a week, but it means I'll have more time to help Matt and spend it with my family.  Plus Garrett won't have to go to an after school program very much at all, and that makes me happy.  So, while it's hard and I'm tired, I think it's a good fit for us.  But, yes, I miss my kids when I'm at work, I miss their sweet faces and their hugs and kisses and Payton's funny little quirks, but maybe I enjoy all those things a little bit more now since I don't get to see it all day anymore.

Easter Sunday

After the Easter vigil, I came home to Matt sleeping on the couch, and dishes and toys scattered everywhere.  I had to clean up, put together the Easter baskets and hide eggs, so I didn't get to bed until after 1, needless to say, I wasn't in much of the Easter mood.  But, when Garrett came in our room about 7 and said the Easter bunny had come, I fed off his excitement.  Payton woke at the same time he did, so we got her up.  Garrett ran right to the baskets, Payton ran right to the eggs screaming Candy, guess we know what she likes, lol!  I let them eat candy for a bit, then we cooked a nice breakfast and cleaned up the house.  Matt's family was coming for an early dinner.  I had cleaned pretty good on Friday, but the floors needed to be done and we needed to declutter, plus all the laundry had to be put up.  After we cleaned up, we took a picnic lunch to the park, we had a great time playing and swinging.  We came home and laid Payton down, then Garrett, Matt & I watched a little tv.  We went from a 4pm dinner to 6, to accommodate Brandon's family.  I won't say I wasn't a bit frustrated.  Matt's brother didn't want to get together with us at all and we decided on dinner to accommodate Lindsay and her boyfriend only to move dinner even later, because they didn't want to "be rude to his family".  Not sure how it wasn't rude to us, but whatever.  I really wanted an early dinner so the kids could get to bed early since this was the first full week of them having to get up so early.  As it was everyone didn't leave until after 8, both kids were in bed at 8:30, an our late for Payton :-(

Dinner itself was really good.  We had ham, fresh green beans, a cheesy potato casserole, rolls and a salad.  Then for dessert we had angel food cake with strawberries.  Nothing too fancy, but all very tasty!

I know I get frustrated around the holidays, I miss my family a lot, and it seems like pulling teeth to get together with Matt's family.  You'd think after 7 years I'd be used to it and let it go, but it really still bothers me.  But, we had a great family day and even managed to get a couple cute family photos, hopefully I can upload those later today.  Garrett and I also talked about the real meaning of Easter and he seems to be getting the concept of God and Jesus and all the stories we tell, so that was really nice too.

Easter Vigil

Saturday night, Lindsay was confirmed.  She had decided to covert from Baptist to Catholic, and all adults are baptized and confirmed the night before Easter.  Since it was from 8:15-11:15 at night, Matt stayed home with the kids.  I hadn't been to an Easter Vigil in years, but I remembered enough that it was going to be in the dark and long.  Lindsay's parents were supposed to save me a seat, but they were getting there about 7:30, I planned on arriving about 8.  But, when I got there, I couldn't find anyone!!  No one had their phones on and despite the family knowing I was coming, no one was even looking for me.  I was a bit upset.  I ended up sitting in the very back of the church by myself.  I just kept thinking how different our family's are.  If it was my sil, Beth, meeting our family.  I'm pretty sure my Dad would have been waiting at the door, or my mom or sister would have texted her to say, "hey, we're 5 rows from the front, on the left", or something along those lines.  And I'm pretty sure we'd all have had our phones on vibrate until she had arrived, in case she had any trouble finding us.  Matt's family made no effort to look for me and didn't seem overly concerned that I hadn't found them.  I really missed my family in that moment.

The service itself was fine, it was long, 4+ hours long.  It was quite beautiful when the candles were all lit, but it was dark for 90%of the service.  I couldn't see much, barely saw Lindsay actually receive communion, since I was so far back!  And for the first time ever, I left right after communion.  I was still frustrated about the seating and it had been 4 hours in a very uncomfortable chair, so after communion I made my way to the door. 

I'm glad I was there for Lindsay, but I do think my mood ruined most of the service for me.  I even cried at one point just thinking about how different our families really are.  My mom was texting me and kept telling me I was in church, I needed to ask God for strength and understanding, but it was hard for me to do.  I don't get how they still don't include me and Matt and I have been married for 7 years now.  It hurts, it really does.

JOB!!

I have a friend, Diane, who started working or a dentist back in September or so, Dr. Lasall.  She mentioned in passing one day that they may be hiring, since 2 girls in their office were pregnant, well, about 3 weeks ago, I stopped by to drop off my resume and just meet the office manager, turns out she liked me :-)  Last Sunday, the Dr called (the office manager is his wife) and we set up an interview for Monday.  On Monday, they both seemed to like me, but since I had no medical experience, they suggested I come in Wednesday for what they called a "working interview", a chance for me to see if it was something I'd like to do and for them to see if they felt I'd fit in with their office staff.  Both kids have school on Wed, so I thought that would work perfect.  Wednesday went very well, it is different from what I've done before, but also very similar, there's customer service in greeting the patients and answering the phones, but it's different because I don't know any of the codes used in medical terminology, but all 3 girls in the office assured me, I'd pick up on it pretty fast.  So, after my few hours on Wed, we all agreed, I'd start full time......the very next day!  I had to scramble to get Garrett moved to full time care and Payton signed up for full time care at Powersports, so sadly, Wed was her last day with the teachers at her old school, she really didn't understand that she was saying bye for good.

Thursday was a good day.  I woke up at 6, had the kids up at 6:45 and we were out the door by 7:15, wearing scrubs helps a LOT!  I even managed to get both kids hair combed, and styled, lunches packed, I even did the dishes and got dinner in the crockpot!  The kids were the first ones there at 7:30 and I was the first to work at 7:45.  We had a long lunch, 1.5 hours, so on my lunch break, I ran to 2 banks and picked up a check from a customer for Matt.  The good thing about this job is it's 8-2 everyday, except for every other week where we work 8-5, mon, tues, and thurs.  It's nice because I'll still be able to help Matt out but bad because it's not a full 80 hour paycheck.  But, it will include paid benefits for me, and we'll just pay the difference for the family and of course, dental care is free :-)  Unfortunately, they were the last kids piked up, but that will only happen 3 days a week, every other week, the rest of the time I can be there earlier, but I'll wait until after Payton's nap, so I can help Matt or get errands done.

The kids did great at school, Garrett was thrilled to be the big brother and was happy to help out with Payton.  His day wasn't much different, just longer.  Payton's was a lot different, new teachers, new friends, new school and a much longer day, but going up there so much to pick up Garrett I think helped the transition a lot.  Her teacher sent home a note saying she did great.  She did not eat a very good lunch and refused to nap, both of which are very unusual for her, but we all agreed she was just so excited and over stimulated.  Hopefully next week goes much smoother for her.  Payton is easily a 2-3 hour napper, so no nap was hard on her!  She was in bed at 7, and probably would have gone to bed at 6:30!  The hard part for me, is I'll never really see her teacher.  Her teacher is Ms Devan, and she works 9-2, before and after that she'll be with Garrett's teacher, Ms Mimi.  I trust ms Mimi fully, she's had Garrett for 2 years, and I got a nice report from her about Payton's day, but it's hard not actually seeing her teacher.  I forgot to tell them she naps with a diaper, so it may be good she never did fall asleep!  She stays dry a lot, but who wants to take that chance!

The job itself is going to be good.  The pay starts out pretty low, but he assured me he is very generous with his raises and once I start learning things he'll give me a raise.  Everyone in the office backed this up, so I am hoping I catch on fast so I can get out of their training pay!  The pay I listed he said was more then reasonable and maybe even a bit low.  So, while I won't be back to what I was making at Wells Fargo, I will be bringing home a paycheck, and it will feel like a raise when Garrett starts school in the fall.  I didn't want to turn it down, everything seemed so right, it all just fell into place, unlike any other job offer I've had this was a lower pay then many, but felt like it could really be something I'd enjoy.  They seem to set it up to be a career, not just a job.  There's also a 401k, which I feel is unheard of in a small office.  Not sure I see myself being a receptionist in a dental office for the next 10 or 20 years, but he said he doesn't either, he sees me taking over as office manager or being a dental assistant or even a position they haven't thought of yet.

For now, I'm just trying to get back into the groove of working.  Last time I had to be to an office on time, I only had one child, so this is a bit different, but not too bad.  And I'm very excited about the future possibilities!

O'Banion Easter

I'm a bit behind, but on Saturday we celebrated Easter early with Matt's family.  His cousin Kelley was in from Colorado with her 2 boys, so we took advantage of the extra family and all got together at Matt's parents house.  This year we opted to skip the Easter egg hunt at the library, there's just too many people and I don't enjoy the rush rush and then worrying about your kid taking off and losing them in the crowds. 

Matt got a last minute call to play in a softball tournament, so he started all the meat the night before, neither of us slept well, because he kept getting up to check on it, then he and Garrett left for softball, while Payton and I got dressed and then ran to meet a customer then ran to find rain boots.  Because of all the rain last week, Honey & PaPa's yard was a bit squishy, so my efforts to get Payton quite Easter sandals were in vain.

In all, the day was very nice.  Garrett played with Adam & Mitchell very well, Payton just hung out with whoever she wanted.  After we ate lunch, the kids did the traditional Easter egg hunt, I think they all had fun, even though by then it was easily 86 and very steamy out.  They ran around in their rain boots and collected as many eggs as would fit into the baskets.  I brought a very warn out Payton home about 3:30 and she napped for a very short amount of time, then we were off to a friends house for a party.  We were super busy on Saturday!!

This Saturday night, I'm going to watch Lindsay get confirmed, she's converting from Baptist to Catholic, so I'll be attending the Easter vigil from 8-11, at night, in the dark!  I have no idea what we are doing Sunday.  We talked about inviting Matt's family over for lunch or dinner and just kind of hang out and relax, but we haven't made much of an effort on planning that, so we'll see what we end up doing.

25 months

I know, it's weird to post about Payton's 25 month "birthday", but I feel like she's made a lot of changes in the past month, so I wanted to record things so I remember them.

The biggest thing is the potty training, yep, she is potty trained, she pees and poops in the potty, and seems to be staying dry at nap time!  It's been well over a week and I still put a diaper on her for her naps, but it's quickly dawning n me we may not need to do this for much longer.  Funny how different your kids can be!  Payton really potty trained in one day, Garrett wasn't peeing in the potty until 3, and he wasn't pooping consistently until 4.5 maybe, he drove me crazy with the poops!

She is also quite the talker now, she repeats a lot of what we say, but I've noticed her talking in complete sentences so much more lately.

She doesn't say again or another, she says more.  She'll say things like "more somersault" or "somersault more", instead of again.  of course, now I can't think of the funnier expressions she uses that are all jumbled up, but I'll add them as she says them.

She still loves her shoes, but now she loves taking them off and trying to put them on, her favorite shoes in the house are Garrett's, because they are big enough that she can put them on herself but small enough that she can walk in them and not be tripping all over the place.  She's outgrown almost all of her size 6 shoes, so yesterday at Wal-mart I grabbed a new pair of sneakers for her, and she refused to take them off so she penguin walked in them all the way to the register, she got quite a few laughs in the store.

She HAS to walk everywhere, the stroller isn't really an option unless I'm walking for exercise and going fast, and the shopping cart is  a huge fight, she will demand to walk "I walk, momma".  And she's starting to exhibit her temper when she isn't allowed to walk.

Yes, she is starting to show us her temper more and more.  She's not as bad as Garrett was, but she's still young, so we'll see where it goes.  Usually she's upset that she has to come inside or that she can't play inside my car, for some reason that is her favorite thing to do.

She's playing dress up and puzzles and loves to read and is pretending more and more with her baby dolls and her kitchen.  It's quite precious to watch her, because most everything she does is just mimicking or repeating us, and it's so heart warming to watch her sing to her dolls and rub their backs, because these are the things we do to her.

She is still a great eater, she'll eat most anything you give her, even things I sometimes think she won't touch, she'll gobble up.  Oh, and she loves to eat outside, it's warming up here so we've had lunch outside almost every day for a week, she's starting to understand that it's only lunch we eat outside, but for a few days she asked to eat breakfast, lunch and dinner outside, lol.

She is still not a cuddler, she does like to sit with you to read books, and while she may not always sit on your lap, she will sit right next to you and rest her hand on your leg.  But, forget rocking and singing songs at night, it's just not going to happen!

She's very polite, and it's always "thank you, momma".  And she'll say it for everything you give her.  We are still working on please.  Garrett barely says please without being prompted, it drives me nuts, I don't get why thank you is so easy for my kids but please is so hard.

And she's still a great sleeper, bedtime is later now that it's warmer and we are spending our evenings outside, but she generally sleeps 12 hours at night and naps are 2-3 hours depending on what's going on.  And yes, she stays dry those entire 3 hours!!

She is such a joy to us, she is very loving, she has to kiss everyone for naps and bedtime, and when we drop Garrett off at school she has to kiss and hug him, same for pickup.  She's starting to just randomly come over and kiss us when we are playing or working outside.

Oh, and her hair is still a mess, it's too short still for a pony tail (due to Garrett's handiwork).  The pigtails work, but her hair is so fine even the tiniest ties start slipping out by nap time.  She doesn't love having her hair done but she doesn't like it in her eyes, so she'll let me do it.  But, ties only, no bows, no barrettes, no headbands.  Yes, I have hair envy of some of my friends daughters hair, lol.  I know when it's long we'll fight over combing it, so I'm trying to enjoy it as it is.  It still has curl to it and is very blond, all traces of red a re gone.  Her and Garrett have almost the exact same color hair.  It makes me want to be blond again!!

Tired

So, this last week I found myself just dragging, I was depressed, sad, just plain tired.  I wasn't getting much joy from anything.  I do get homesick for my family, and I honestly just feel like I"m on an island all by myself.  Matt is and will be working a lot more hours and I can either go insane or fight my way out of the depression.  I will say, it was Matt who dragged me up and out of it.  I've been wanting to do "something", I had no idea what, but the daily grind of nothing has been wearing me down.  I'm constantly on edge waiting for him to call to run and do something for work, so I find I'm not even enjoying my kid time, I'm too stressed over money and him working and dwelling on how many hours it will be until I have an adult to talk to.  So, I'm getting back onto a project track.  Sunday I spent 4 hours, yes 4, weeding one side of our front flower bed, it was that bad.  For some reason I just kept thinking Matt was going to do it, I finally realized, I need to be doing it.  I do draw the line at cutting the grass, I don't think that's in any way safe with a 2 year old running around, esp one scared of loud noises, so I don't know when that will get cut, but somehow Matt's going to have to find the time for it.  But, I've decided I am going to paint the front door, make a wreath and start a garden. 
I originally thought about doing the garden in the front yard, but Matt decided we really need to tear out what's there and redo the rocks and bring in new dirt and mulch, it's looking really dated, so I was disappointed, starting a garden from scratch could be really pricey, but this morning I realized there's plenty of room under the trees in the back yard.  It is going to require serious weeding, but I think I can do it.  My kids LOVE being outside, so this way, even if Payton isn't helping me weed, we can be outside together and maybe my work will start rubbing off on the kids and they'll become interested.  I've got some ideas of what to plant, it'll be at least a week, it's going to take some serious work on that area to clean it up.  But, I'm hoping this gives me some motivation and something to look forward to.  I'm also hoping that Garrett will get involved if I let him pick out some things to plant.
My biggest issue is money, we never have enough, but I need to just spend a little bit here and there and hopefully it will not break the bank to do some projects and keep me feeling like I'm accomplishing something!